Ya-Ya

Even before I met Dale in person she was already telling me all about her "Ya-Ya" sisters. I guess I really have been living a tunnel-visioned life for a long time now, I didn't have a clue there were movies and books detailing the divine secrets of the Ya-Ya sisterhood. It wasn't because of a “man-thang” it was due more out of a “lost in my own little world-thang.”

Yvette, Andrea, and Georgia who along with their sorority sister Dale make up the local chapter of the Ya-Ya's here in Oneonta. What an interesting and lengthy plethora of stories they have to share about their adventures as well as their many misadventures. I'm convinced I've only heard those at the tip of the iceberg so far and can't wait to hear more. Afterall, I can always use new material for my writings.

Anyway, I watched the movie this week for the first time. It took me three attempts to get the whole thing in (but I did it, so men that just goes to show you how you can too) and I actually enjoyed it very much. I believe I liked the character James Garner played the most. Maybe, for me anyway that was the person that came closest to representing me in the movie. Ever think about how we look for that? If you have your own reasons for never watching this movie then let me suggest - you should really consider giving it a view, I believe its well worth the time. It's full of real life, messed up love, and the importance of working through all of the "stuff" in order to become healthier, happier, and more secure with the person we truly are.

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Sunday I began reading from the 1st. book of Chronicles (I know, its really not my favorite either) and I found that David, the mighty warrior that he was had his own little group of Ya-Ya's. In the 11th. chapter the writer goes into full detail (names and personal information) about David's closest allies, and in this mix was what he simply referred to as “The Three”. These were the mightiest of the mighty. An elite army of only three men that handled all of the Black-Ops for David. They were well known for thier slaying of hundreds, upon hundreds in battle. These guys were more than warriors and conquerers, they along with David made up the Ya-Ya's of thier day.

What's interesting is that only two of them are mentioned by name here. Jashobeam the Hacmonite, and Elezar the son of Dodai. The writer details the most significant reasons they were chosen to be in this prestigious group, yet the third guy remains nameless as far as I know. If you know of a place where he's mentioned please share this with me - I sure couldn't find it. I would love to know who this mystery warrior was. These guys would put their lives at risk for David at even the slightest hint from him, and it says that he truly appreciated their loyalty. (Read verses 15-19 to see what I'm referring to.) They were Ya-Ya's through and through.

The writer goes on in that same chapter to list some forty warriors by name who stood toe to toe with David's enemies, time and time again. Always declaring that the Victory was God's, and God's alone. Yet, still no mention of the name of the third member of the Ya-Ya's. You get the idea that this small over-sight (as I choose to see it) bothers me just a bit? I know, its the "little stuff" I have issues with. Dale reminded me of this again just this morning. I'm working on it honey!

sidebar: something I can't remember reading before, in the 22nd verse of that chapter it talks about how Benaiah, a valiant warrior from Kabzeel (and one of "the thirty") chased down and killed a lion despite the slippery conditions from the snow on the ground. Snow – it mentions snow on the ground, now that's something I don't often think about when recalling the adventures as well as the misadventures of young David and his battling band of Ya-Ya's. It also says that Benaiah slayed a man that stood seven and a half feet tall, which I bet really hurt the Philistine's chances of taking home the Olympic gold medal in basketball that year. Not funny, I know.

Anyway, back to when I was watching the Ya-Ya flick - I began to ask myself, who are my Ya-Ya's? Who can I count on in times of trouble, despair, and heartbreak? Who would be willing to stand toe to toe in battle with my enemies simply out of the love they have for me? Ask yourself that question. You probably already know the answer. I, on the other hand had to think about it for a bit. I guess because I've had careers where I had to relocate a lot over the years I've been a little less diligent in maintaining true friendships than I should have been. I guess I've even failed to do that lately as well. Actually, I got to thinking that if we allow such things as travel distance and busy work schedules to be determining factors in our relationships there's probably something screwed up to begin with. For real friends are supposed to be hidden safely in our hearts irregardless of circumstances and situations – they're just always supposed to be there, period, no matter what.

I've found that for me my Ya-Ya's are the same three which are talked about so much in the book “The Shack”. I may have a very different description of them mentally, but the Son, The Father, and The Holy Spirit make up the divine sisterhood/brotherhood of my life. They were there for me even when I wasn't there for them. They were there for me when I wasn't sure I believed they truly existed, or even that they truly loved me. They were there when I doubted that I could count on them, or trust them. They are simply always there for me, and today I'm so thankful for them - my personal Ya-Ya's!
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I admittedly have “trust issues” and they've prevented me from letting people get really, really close to me. This has prevented me from joining in on a blood-sharing swearing in ceremony with my own band of earthly Ya-Ya's. For far too long I've secretly held onto mistrusts even toward those that only want to love me with the purist of intentions. This I know – this God knows. But this He also knows - I want to get better at it. I want to let go of all the things from my past that have harbored the damaging feelings of mistrust which the enemy has impregnated my mind with for far too long. I want to let go, and trust in my true Ya-Ya's, both the earthly ones as well as the heavenly ones.

And this I know above all - He is my Ya-Ya! He is my El-shaddai. He will stand toe to toe with my enemies and will deliver victory over such stuff as mistrust and fear. For His word reveals to us/me that the battle became Victory at the site of an empty tomb some two thousand years ago. I simply need to always rest in the knowledge that He goes before me!

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For two weeks I had planned the biggest surprise I could think of for Dale. She and I had agreed that we just wanted a small wedding with only our very speical friends Linda and Roy there to act as witnesses. Outdoors, early in the morning, looking out over a beautiful river – simple, very simple. It was to be just us as we stood before our Saviour and Deliverer to proclaim His greatness and thank him for the gift of true love which He's so divinely imparted to us. Because of this, we told very few friends of our plans. We just didn't want to cause any hurt feelings since we weren't inviting anyone. Yet, I knew how much it would mean to my beautiful bride if her Ya-Ya sisters were there. So I began to communicate in secret with them. Late night texts and awkward phone conversations while Dale was in the room all added up to being able to accomplish the one thing I knew she would be willing to forgive me of for keeping a secret from her.

On that beautiful Saturday morning her sisters got up early and made the lengthy drive over to Chattanooga, and there they hid behind a block wall as we rounded the corner. Something was said and Dale turned to see in total shock and surprise the girls she loves so much. Once again, as they have always done in the past they were there for her for no other reason than out of pure love. All any of us could do was cry. She told me what I already knew "I couldn't have given her any better wedding gift."

I don't know how long it took us to gather ourselves back together, but the wedding went off perfectly just as God had promised to deliver. What an amazing Father, one who gives us gifts the magnitude of Ya-Ya's and true love. It allows things such as mistrust, fear, and not knowing the name of the third warrior of David's inner circle to be seen for what they truly are - of little importance.

Today, with His blood flowing through me I reach out for your hand and take the oath of friendship with you. I choose to make you my Ya-Ya, and I hope you'll offer me the same.
Lets celebrate.

Ya -Ya!!!!

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Oh yeah before I forget I thought I would include the vows Dale and I shared with each other that day. Please pray that we never turn our face from the One that has called us into His ministry, and has given us the promise that we have a place in His kingdom. I hope you enjoy reading them as much as we did.

Doug's vows:
Today marks the day that will forever define the joining together of two hearts that have longed to be truly loved. I so admire the beautiful woman God has made you. I'm in awe of the blessed woman Christ sacrificed his life for, and I celebrate the strong woman in which the Holy Spirit resides.

My eyes can't get enough of your beauty. My thirst for your kisses will never be quenched. My eyes will never grow tired of the sound of your laughter. My arms will always ache with emptiness when we're apart, and even though some may think it's unmanly to admit this, I have butterflies in my stomach as I stand here looking into your eyes this morning. My feet will never grow weary or be still as long as you'll continue to join me on this journey.

God's Will is our navigator – His Grace will forever save us – His Love will sustain us – and His presence is our destination.

Your unconditional love is my only request, yet my unconditional love is only the beginning of the gifts I have to offer you in return. Our friendship sets us apart from the norm, and it's our commitment to each other that draws us so close together. Our sense of humor gives us the right perspective on life, and it's our intimacy which gives us the fulfillment we've always desired. I love you more today than ever before, yet less than what it'll be when we get to where we're going.


Dale's vows I am my beloveds and he is mine.
I thought I knew what love was before but I had only dreamed of what it could be, what it should be, and what I wanted it to be, until God brought you to me I had never known it.

Now, I know of what it was I dreamed.

The “dode” love God created is to be between a man and a woman. If only the whole world could know and receive the same gift from God that he has given us.

You are the mirror of myself - my twin - born of love from God's own heart. You, Doug are the greatest blessing He has ever given me. I promise you I will never insult our Lord by returning void his precious gift, one I never deserved in the first place.

As you and I have discussed many times, God in His infinite wisdom brought us together and we know to thank Him and honor Him for this blessing will take the remainder of our lives.

To you, Douglas Sharp I commit myself - mind, body, and spirit before God and these witnesses with all the love I have to give unconditionally until the end of my days, I swallow the key!

I am highly blessed among women! I am my beloveds and he is mine.

Ya-Ya!